Friday, August 24, 2007

Malu Fernandez Vs. Bom Chicka Wahwahs Et Al.

Malu Fernandez made a formal apology to the Overseas Filipino Workers (OFWs) and resigned from the Manila Standard and People Asia Magazine. Although, I’m not convinced by the insincere tone of her apology, I would leave further whippings to the gods.

Anyway, this is just one side of the big story.

It was reported that the Bom Chicka Wahwahs (BCWWs) were induced to a hulk-rage after hearing Malu's maligning of Axe. The controversial article states:
"On my way back, I had
to bravely
take the
economy flight once more. This time I had already
resigned myself
being trapped like a sardine in
a sardine can
with all these OFWs
smelling of AXE and Charlie cologne
while my Jo Malone
evaporated into thin

The BCWWs are currently plotting their counter-offensive against Malu. Here is their picture after the hulk-rage:

"Connect the dots."

However, the BCWWs deem that their combined powers (and weight) are not enough to topple their humongous adversary. This is why they summoned the help of Dumbo, Moby Dick, Godzilla, King Kong and Ultraman.

In a related story, the producers of Babe are thinking of cashing in on this brouhaha by making a sequel entitled, Babe: Fierce and Fabulous from Greece to La Loma.

In the draft script, Babe licks a magical stone in the Parthenon and suddenly becomes a human with a Philippine passport. Human Babe, goes back to the Philippines to write about her travel experience.

But her animalistic instincts made her write insensitive and unenlightened things about the Filipinos. Babe must do everything in order to appease the angry Filipinos in order to avoid the same fate of F4 in the next Batangas Lechon Parade.

"F4 singing 'Oh Ba-be, Ba-be, Ba-be...'"

Note: The above story about Malu, the BCWWs and Babe is fictional, dumbass!

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